BioWare According to Mom

Things my mother has to say about BioWare's Dragon Age and Mass Effect games, from text conversations to phone calls to observations.

Dragon Age
Female human noble rogue
Female city elf.
Tag :: Dragon Age According to Mom

Dragon Age 2
Female mage
Tag :: Dragon Age (2) According to Mom

Mass Effect
Female infiltrator
Tag :: Mass Effect According to Mom
Posts tagged "mass efect"

Mom: Okay, so while we have a minute and I’m attempting to understand this… [deep breath] This is very twisted.
Reg: How so?
Mom: Genocide is always twisted. And I don’t think I can trust this kid as far as I can throw him. However…
Reg: However?
Mom: In nature, fires happen. Small fires are completely natural. And without them, a thick canopy would choke sunlight and prevent it from creating new growth. Plants on the ground would die, and animals would suffer. In a way… that’s what he’s doing. [taps fingers on desk] Are you writing this down?
Reg: Yes.
Mom: The whole internet is going to read it?
Reg: Not the whole internet.
Mom: Let me listen to more of what he has to say.

Mom: Let’s try these brutes again. Now that I know what’s going on. I can do this. [proceeds to kill them]
Reg: Watch out for the—
Garrus: Harvester!
Mom: Harvester? Whe—WHY IS IT LANDING ON ME?!
Reg: RUN AWAY!
Mom: WHY IS IT ALWAYS LANDING ON ME?!
Reg: KILL IT!
Mom: [kills it] Okay, so now missi—WHERE DID THAT BANSHEE COME FROM?

Okay so this is pretty amusing.

Mom: used teh laser thing on the reapr
Mom: and then the suits dropped a bom bon it but its not dead
Mom: there resilient
Reg: They live in deep space. They’d have to be.
Mom: y?
Reg: There’s no atmosphere to protect you from radiation in space for one. And it’s damn cold for another.
Mom: o that makes snes
Mom: ok
Mom: im going 2 shoot this thing more

Soon. Soon.

Mom: i liek scannig plants more in this game
Mom: its easier
Reg: It stresses me out.
Mom: u just bget bw things
Mom: click
Mom: find 1 thing
Mom: then u kno how many more u need
Mom: easy
Reg: Until the Reapers find you.
Mom: y
Mom: but its not hard 2 outrun tehm
Mom: u cant do it?
Mom: i will do it 4 u

:| I beat the game with a higher EMS than you’ll have leave me alone.

Mom: Reg? Honey? Are you getting up for work?
Reg: Mrglf?
Mom: It’s ten after seven.
Reg: WHY DID MY ALARM NOT GO OFF?! [bolts out of bed, gets clothes, goes to bathroom; returns to find Mom booting up computer] My alarm didn’t go off because it’s 6:40.
Mom: I just couldn’t wait. I want to see Beans.
Reg: Mom. I’m beginning to think Dad is right. You may have a problem.
Mom: No, I don’t.
Reg: Then we need to discuss boundaries.
Mom: Still my house.
Reg: [changes gears] Weren’t you going to Eden Prime?
Mom: I think it would be better to go there right before the end, don’t you? Returning to the place it all began.
Reg: You’re doing this to spite me.
Mom: Yep.

At this rate, I will need to move my desktop into her office.