BioWare According to Mom

Much as Mom and I try to keep life from interfering with posts, that doesn’t always happen! 

We took a brief break for Christmas. Then I started a new job. And I moved. In so doing, I took the only computer in the house that will run Inquisition with me. She should be finishing up Legacy next week (I think, I’m not sure what she’s doing right now) since her computer can run DA2, but she’s shopping for a computer that will run Inquisition, too! 

Stay tuned, we’re not gone! Promise!

Mom: qunari spies r on that list!
Reg: What are you going to do about it?
Mom: i demanded the scroll but she just gave me this tacky necklace
Mom: i like her but i probably should have tried 2 kill her
Mom: mayb next time

Inquisition is just going to be death and blood everywhere.

Mom: so teh duke was makin a deal w the qunari
Mom: nd then killed this salit
Mom: now were killing him and his wyvern
Mom: today is a good day
Reg: …dare I ask why?
Mom: we were heros
Mom: im hopin the wyvern eats him tho

Wide-eyed idealism mixed with bitter ruthlessness.

Mom: haha
Mom: broody and v r the worst rescuers
Mom: they got lost nd we got out ourselves
Reg: You’re still friends with Tallis even though she lies to you?
Mom: shes killed ppl 4 me
Mom: shes ok

How to get in good with Mom: assassination.

Mom: got thru
Mom: got ambushed
Mom: tallis is a qunari assassin??
Mom: :-O
Mom: thats y teh mark on her armor looked familiar
Mom: should have guessed
Reg: You’re freakishly genre savvy already, it’s okay to be surprised.
Mom: im surprised

There’s a “no one expects the Inquisition” joke here somewhere.

Mom: :-(
Reg: What’s wrong?
Mom: ive been doin this puzzle 4 30 minutes
Reg: It can’t be that bad.
Mom: im rly bad at puzzles :-(
Reg: Give it one more shot and if you can’t get it, go to YouTube.
Mom: there r answers on utube???
Reg: Walkthroughs, yes.
Mom: but thats cheatin!!

Will kill hundreds of apostates, templars, tal-vashoth, etc., but will not cheat on puzzles. My mother.

Mom: i think tallis is mad at me
Reg: Why?
Mom: she said we could sneak
Mom: were not sneakin
Reg: Are you murdering your way through the castle?
Mom: sneakin takes 2 much tiem

To be fair, sneaking through that place is agonizing.

Mom: poor tallis had 2 sleep w some1 i think
Mom: [several minutes later] now i do
Mom: i cant b unfaithful 2 broody
Mom: mayb i can just punch him and search his body??
Mom: i punched him

Forever with the direct approach.

Mom: what am i wearing??
Mom: that outfit just doesn’t work
Reg: Did you not notice Hawke’s awesome pajamas when you’re in your house?
Mom: y
Mom: i was 2 polite 2 say anythin then
Mom: but this is
Reg: Heinous?
Mom: y

Fashion is serious business of course.

Mom: i spent all that fight running in circles while my friends killed teh wyvern
Mom: it kept chasing me
Reg: Hey, kiting is a sound strategy.
Mom: this french punk is tryin 2 steal my victory
Reg: Did you really call him a French punk?
Mom: do u not say that these days??

Mom is trying to be hip. Mom is failing.